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Kinetix
08-07-2006, 08:30 PM
I know this is old news, but it's rediculous.



A Portland, Ore. man has filed a lawsuit for $832 million, saying he is tired of being mistaken for Michael Jordan, according to KGW-TV.

The television station's Web site says Allen Heckard filed the suit against His Airness and Nike founder Phil Knight on June 29 in county court, claiming to have been mistaken for the basketball legend nearly every day for the past 15 years.
And he's tired of it.

"I'm constantly being accused of looking like Michael and it makes it very uncomfortable for me," Heckard reportedly said.

Heckard apparently is suing Jordan for defamation and permanent injury, emotional pain and suffering. He is suing Knight for defamation and permanent injury for promoting Jordan and making him one of the world's most famous athletes.

Heckard, who stands slightly taller than 6 feet, says many people miss the fact that he is roughly six inches shorter than Jordan.

But Heckard bears a physical resemblance to Jordan because he has a shaved head, an earring in his left ear, and is in good physical shape — from playing basketball.

"Even when I go to the gym I'm being accused of playing ball like him (Jordan)," Heckard said.

Wouldn't most people consider that a compliment?

"Yes, don't get me wrong it's definitely a positive thing, because Michael, like I say is one of the best ball players that I've known to play the game. But then again, that's Michael and I'm me. So I want to be recognized as me just like Michael's being recognized as Michael."

The television station apparently caught Heckard wearing blue Air Jordan tennis shoes.

Is Heckard trying to look like Jordan?

No.

"They're very comfortable shoes to play ball in," said Heckard. "I play a lot of basketball and any other shoes I try to play in tend to hurt the bottom of my feet."

What made Heckard decide to file suit against Jordan and Knight for $416 million each?

"Well, you figure with my age and you multiply that times seven and then I turn around and I figure that's what it all boils down to."

http://msn.foxsports.com/nba/story/5766288

razoras
08-07-2006, 09:06 PM
Fix Title. Wrong Mike in it. @_@

To the inevitable follow-up "It's the right one!" post: Yes, but it was incorrect before. :P

Yin
08-07-2006, 09:12 PM
Ridiculous.

How can you sue a celebrity, Michael Jordan at that, for YOU looking like HIM? I'd take it as a compliment and use it to my advantage. That's bogus. If he actually wins the money then America has gone to hell.

MajorMarvel
08-07-2006, 09:41 PM
you know, if he wins this, I might just sue Major League Baseball because people constantly pesture me if I'm related too Tom Seaver(Real names Tom Sever, Pronounced the same) And it drives me nuts :P

WingedAvenger
08-07-2006, 09:55 PM
That story almost reads like an April Fool's joke.

I certainly do hope he wins though. Then I can start suing celebrities that I kinda sorta resemble, and make millions.

Maveric
08-07-2006, 10:00 PM
wit a minute? so the dude cut up his face, chipped off his nose, and bleached his skin? (i wonder if he used lotion) he was born that way?

lol, just foolin's :P fix the damn titel! :P

yeah, i said titel...

time for another crown and seven :)

-Mav

AfterglowNoMore
08-07-2006, 10:33 PM
Fixed.

Valcarde
08-07-2006, 10:42 PM
I recieved an email about this a few months ago, from the Stella Awards newsletter. Guy was acting as his own attorney as well. When I get a chance to dig it up, I'll post the Stella Awards article about it, which includes the paperwork he did to file the suit.

... I'm appalled that this suit is even making it to court.

Quakester
08-07-2006, 10:44 PM
Proof that anyone can sue anyone for anything. God bless America. :p

Kinetix
08-07-2006, 10:47 PM
I wrote Michael Jackson? Man, I must've been really in a rush to get to work.

Kid Ferret_
08-07-2006, 10:57 PM
That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard. If you don't want to look like him, rip the damn earing out of your ear, grow hair, and find another shoe!

TroubleWolf
08-07-2006, 11:15 PM
I have the same problem with women mistaking me for Peter North.

Solario
08-07-2006, 11:18 PM
I have the same problem with women mistaking me for Peter North.

There's a Ron Jeremy joke hiding somewhere in there, but I'll be damned if I'm not to tired to be funny.

TroubleWolf
08-07-2006, 11:29 PM
There's a Ron Jeremy joke hiding somewhere in there, but I'll be damned if I'm not to tired to be funny.
If I were as hairy as RJ, I would bathe in Nair.














And then I would be dramastically smoother.