The Widowed
06-13-2006, 01:06 PM
http://coh.tritonius.com/bw.gif First off, let us welcome Frost Mynx into the ranks. Do not be alarmed by the eight treasure maps which are presently scattered throughout the Wonderland base, as I shall remove them in due time; Those are merely the remnants of the initiation trial I held for Frost Mynx, who managed to do very well by finding seven of them within the six-minute limit. Kryo makes you sing and dance, I make you answer riddles or send you on silly treasure hunts. As long as you have that liquid thinking that we're looking for, you'll do well in Malice in Wonderland. :D
Come to that, I would like to hobnob with both Kryogentic and Alone in the near future, so that we may establish a semi-solid system for rank or promotion. It doesn't have to be anything too concrete; We're more the "lunatic anarchist" type of villain than the "iron-fisted despot" type, after all. We are the Chaotic Neutrals, Neutral Evils and Chaotic Evils of the batch; As long as you're not blabbering about being the Antichrist as you slaughter a bazillion innocent bystanders with high explosives and call the combined wrath of Arachnos and Longbow down on our heads, we don't care what you do with your free time. I myself have a baker's half-dozen of independent personalities sharing the same skull and some spooky owl with the spirit of a thousand-year-old flower child following me around and compelling me to shatter every alliance or friendship that I find; Believe me, I know all about otherworldly entities pressuring you to perform. But still, keep it on a leash unless you have a very good scapegoat handy.
On that note, stealing the keys to my personal minifridge is also a bad idea. Perhaps I should ask Alone why my six-pack of Sobe Lizard Blizzard has been reduced to a five-pack and why she was on a bouncy glucose high shortly after that bottle went missing....
Next note: Please confine all potentially dangerous science experiments to the appropriate section of the sewer maze. Last week I had to spend three hours scraping the telepad chamber's ceiling free of icicles which were the size of CD towers. Yes, Wicked Walrus, I'm looking at you.
Also, please confine all potentially dangerous magic experiments to that appropriate section of the sewer maze. All right, I claim full responsibility for the Class IV poltergeist manifestation which ravaged the control room for two hours last Wednesday night. Had I known that aqua regia would react so poorly to the knuckle bones of a hanged man, I wouldn't have attempted to use them as a substitute for the knuckle bones of a man felled by a fatal case of diarrhea. The mistake has been noted for future reference.
Also, I would like for us to reinstate the Crime Conferences which we used to enjoy back when Kryo and I were living in Paragon City and doing our best to keep Malice in Wonderland underground. They are excellent occasions for planning, reviewing, networking, socializing and trying to scam the delivery boy out of free pizzas. Alas, now that we are no longer able to host the Crime Conferences in Gemini Park, the simple joy of pestering SepTa, Kelp Plankton, the SuperBabes, half the Defenders of Paragon and other adjacent goody-goodies will be noticeably absent from future Crime Conferences. Please suggest times and days of the week for majority approval.
Last item: I am throwing together two polls here; One poll will help decide how we use our salvage storage facilities, the other will help decide our next technology-dependent workshop project. Naturally, we would like to limit access to these polls to members of Malice in Wonderland (Reshuffled), but that isn't exactly possible as things stand with these forums. So here's hoping the United Sanction Society doesn't send a spy or three in to screw with us while my psychic back is turned.
In closing, remember to look both ways before you cross the street...unless you're crossing with the intention of beating some deserving fool within an inch of his life, in which case you may as well dash madly across anyway. The ghost of Jerry Garcia will protect you from harm in that case...at least, that's what one of the voices in my head assures me. God bless Jerry Garcia.
...
Well? Aren't you going to say anything now?
Come to that, I would like to hobnob with both Kryogentic and Alone in the near future, so that we may establish a semi-solid system for rank or promotion. It doesn't have to be anything too concrete; We're more the "lunatic anarchist" type of villain than the "iron-fisted despot" type, after all. We are the Chaotic Neutrals, Neutral Evils and Chaotic Evils of the batch; As long as you're not blabbering about being the Antichrist as you slaughter a bazillion innocent bystanders with high explosives and call the combined wrath of Arachnos and Longbow down on our heads, we don't care what you do with your free time. I myself have a baker's half-dozen of independent personalities sharing the same skull and some spooky owl with the spirit of a thousand-year-old flower child following me around and compelling me to shatter every alliance or friendship that I find; Believe me, I know all about otherworldly entities pressuring you to perform. But still, keep it on a leash unless you have a very good scapegoat handy.
On that note, stealing the keys to my personal minifridge is also a bad idea. Perhaps I should ask Alone why my six-pack of Sobe Lizard Blizzard has been reduced to a five-pack and why she was on a bouncy glucose high shortly after that bottle went missing....
Next note: Please confine all potentially dangerous science experiments to the appropriate section of the sewer maze. Last week I had to spend three hours scraping the telepad chamber's ceiling free of icicles which were the size of CD towers. Yes, Wicked Walrus, I'm looking at you.
Also, please confine all potentially dangerous magic experiments to that appropriate section of the sewer maze. All right, I claim full responsibility for the Class IV poltergeist manifestation which ravaged the control room for two hours last Wednesday night. Had I known that aqua regia would react so poorly to the knuckle bones of a hanged man, I wouldn't have attempted to use them as a substitute for the knuckle bones of a man felled by a fatal case of diarrhea. The mistake has been noted for future reference.
Also, I would like for us to reinstate the Crime Conferences which we used to enjoy back when Kryo and I were living in Paragon City and doing our best to keep Malice in Wonderland underground. They are excellent occasions for planning, reviewing, networking, socializing and trying to scam the delivery boy out of free pizzas. Alas, now that we are no longer able to host the Crime Conferences in Gemini Park, the simple joy of pestering SepTa, Kelp Plankton, the SuperBabes, half the Defenders of Paragon and other adjacent goody-goodies will be noticeably absent from future Crime Conferences. Please suggest times and days of the week for majority approval.
Last item: I am throwing together two polls here; One poll will help decide how we use our salvage storage facilities, the other will help decide our next technology-dependent workshop project. Naturally, we would like to limit access to these polls to members of Malice in Wonderland (Reshuffled), but that isn't exactly possible as things stand with these forums. So here's hoping the United Sanction Society doesn't send a spy or three in to screw with us while my psychic back is turned.
In closing, remember to look both ways before you cross the street...unless you're crossing with the intention of beating some deserving fool within an inch of his life, in which case you may as well dash madly across anyway. The ghost of Jerry Garcia will protect you from harm in that case...at least, that's what one of the voices in my head assures me. God bless Jerry Garcia.
...
Well? Aren't you going to say anything now?