Who the hell touched my food?

[Inertial]

I put blueberry muffins in our refridgerator, now they are all friggin' gone.

The Umbral Wrath kicks the refridgerator door shut and leaves a dent before turning to a now empty room with a murderous glare.

Those were my goddamn muffins, did anybody see malakka written on them?

Nooooo, well thats cause it wasn't friggin' on them assholes. Stop eating my goddamn food, I don't put it in there to be 'et by malakkas.

The Umbral Wrath storms angrily off and loud clamouring is heard followed by the bang of a cabinet door being slammed shut.

The Umbral Wrath has returned to the common room with a contraption made of about thirty post it nots posted together, muttering pointidly he applies it to refridgerator door.

A furious scribbling is heard followed by a triumphent "Hooooah" before one very angry man storms out of the room in search of a good blueberry muffin.

On closer inspection the note reads

Touch my food again and im gonna boot the hell outta yas when I find ya. - Umbral

[suburbanhell]

Rest assured, not me comrade, I was once told a long time ago that Maggots make the sex inside blueberries, and I stay away from all berries ever since. But curious, what how you say... in the blue hell is "Malakkas"?

[Inertial]

Gives The Silver Succubus a wary look as if considering the validity of her stated innocence beforing leaning in close to whisper something

"Malakka is slang italian for someone who jerks off a lot."

[suburbanhell]

*Silver Succubus whispers back...*

"I hear that rich, snobby, British females, while extremely uptight in public, do this 'jerking off' thing rather feverishly, and with any chance they can get, so you may want to check with the Anglican."

*Succubus smirks and proceeds to the gym for her nightly workout and meditation sessions.*