Giant Battle Monsters!

[Masked Revenger]

I found this (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi) on another message board. Funny stuff. :chuckle:

Masked Revenger is a Giant Lizard that Glows in the Dark, fires Rockets, shoots Laser Beams, has Black-and-White Stripes, and CANNOT BE STOPPED!

It's True! (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Masked+Revenger&def=Lord+Recluse&a=S)

To battle me, go here. (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster?def=Masked+Revenger)

Chris

[Malibu Sally]

I don't get it. How did your stats get so high? It only gives me some anemic thing with a max stat of 4 or so. :mad:

[Tarberetta]

Ok..I'll battle ya

http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Tarby+Sharpshot&def=Masked+Revenger&a=I

[coldcut]

I actually beat you, despite the fact that I'm a tiny ant.

http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=coldcut&def=Masked+Revenger&a=I

Of course I'm brilliant.

[Masked Revenger]

I don't get it. How did your stats get so high? It only gives me some anemic thing with a max stat of 4 or so. :mad:

I honestly have no idea how it picks the stats. It seems totally random to me.

Chris

[Masked Revenger]

I actually beat you, despite the fact that I'm a tiny ant.

http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=coldcut&def=Masked+Revenger&a=I

Of course I'm brilliant.

And you kidnap blonds, let's not forget that. ;)

Chris

[Malibu Sally]

I don't like this game. I don't like the other two with links at the bottom of the page either. They all give me crap monsters that couldn't defeat a 100 year old quadraplegic Skull. :grumble:

[Masked Revenger]

I don't like this game. I don't like the other two with links at the bottom of the page either. They all give me crap monsters that couldn't defeat a 100 year old quadraplegic Skull. :grumble:

I don't know, your monkey whipped my monkey's ass.

See? (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monkey.cgi?att=Masked+Revenger&def=Malibu+Sally)

And you're robot's (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/robot.cgi?att=Masked+Revenger&def=Malibu+Sally&a=F) not bad either.

I gotta say, I love the description of your robot.

Malibu Sally is a Robot that walks on Three Spindly Legs, is fitted with Twin Airbags and Armour Plating, constantly shouts 'EXTERMINATE', runs on a Single Watch Battery, and can Sidestep Attacks

:D :D :D

Chris

[Malibu Sally]

I don't know, your monkey whipped my monkey's ass.

See? (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monkey.cgi?att=Masked+Revenger&def=Malibu+Sally)

And you're robot's (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/robot.cgi?att=Masked+Revenger&def=Malibu+Sally&a=F) not bad either.

I gotta say, I love the description of your robot.

Malibu Sally is a Robot that walks on Three Spindly Legs, is fitted with Twin Airbags and Armour Plating, constantly shouts 'EXTERMINATE', runs on a Single Watch Battery, and can Sidestep Attacks

:D :D :D

Chris


The "custard eating" description of my battle monkey is rather too suggestive. I hope this thread gets deleted before Esbat sees any of this. :rolleyes:

[Akamaz]

Akamaz is a Banana-Eating Attack Monkey with a Battle Rating of 7.6Unleash your own Food-Eating Battle Monkey agains Akamaz (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monkey?def=Akamaz)

[8 Ball]

I actually beat you, despite the fact that I'm a tiny ant.

http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=coldcut&def=Masked+Revenger&a=I

Of course I'm brilliant.


Take that :D

http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=8+Ball&def=coldcut&a=S

[Poison]

Poison is a Giant Mecha-Ape that is Guarding its Nest, carries a Samurai Sword, and is Radioactive.

Poison beats Akamaz! (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Poison&def=Akamaz&a=A)

[suburbanhell]

I don't like this game. I don't like the other two with links at the bottom of the page either. They all give me crap monsters that couldn't defeat a 100 year old quadraplegic Skull. :grumble:

Agreed.

I mean c'mon: Major 0bvious is a what?!? (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster?def=Major+0bvious)

[coldcut]

Take that :D

http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=8+Ball&def=coldcut&a=S

Oh yeah?

http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=coldcut&def=8+ball&a=I

[8 Ball]

Oh yeah?

http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=coldcut&def=8+ball&a=I


Boo-yeah! You blonde women Kidnapper :P

http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=8+Ball&def=coldcut&a=A

[Tarberetta]

http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=coldcut&def=Tarby+Sharpshot&a=I

[Malibu Sally]

Aha! I've found the secret weapon! Bwahahahahahaha!

http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Malibu+Sally%27s+Bazooms&def=Tarby+Sharpshot&a=S

http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Malibu+Sally%27s+Bazooms&def=coldcut&a=S


And just because of our little confrontation last week.......
http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Malibu+Sally%27s+Bazooms&def=Xanatos&a=S

:P :D

[Tarberetta]

That dosen't look like a squid :o

[Naked Dwarf]

Michi is a Giant Mecha-Squid that has Prehensile Eyes, Suckers on its Feet and Tough Leathery Skin.

Michi is a Robot that seeks Kittens, runs on Nuclear Power, jams Radio Transmissions, and is Completely Motionless and Semi-Organic

Michi
is a
Brain-Eating Jungle Monkey

Battle Rating : 7.4


ND

[Naked Dwarf]

Nimbus is a Robot that fires Shuriken, emits Clouds of Smoke, is fitted with Armour Plating, runs on Coal, and is Completely Motionless

That's so perfect it's scary :)

ND

[Kurai Inago]

Apparently Kurai Inago is a Giant Mecha-Dragon that swallows Aeroplanes Whole, has Crablike Pincers, can Fly, and picks up Cars and Throws Them.

[iggy880]

cool, I like this description:
iggy is a Giant Lizard that spits Ice, emits Ultrasonic Screams, projects a Purple Forcefield, and is Susceptible to Electrical Damage.

[the_starcrosser]

http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monkey.cgi?att=Suede&def=Nyx
Oook oook! :D

[Gaia]

Smacks is a Giant Blob that has Prehensile Eyes and a mean Left Hook, fears the Military, and dislikes Modern Architecture.

Dusty is a Giant Squid that eats Trees, dissolves in Water, has X-Ray Vision and a Long, Prehensile Tongue, and fears the Military. (btw Suede won by one point)

Regal is a Giant Ant that has a Sharp Beak and X-Ray Vision.

Empyreal is a Giant Moth that eats Trees, can Change Shape, and is Radioactive.

Kid Atomic is a Giant Ape that Hovers Eerily, has Staring Red Eyes, enjoys Climbing Buildings, and is Susceptible to Electrical Damage and Blind.

Phoenix is a Giant Lizard that seeks Nuclear Power Stations, has four Extra Limbs, a Computer for a Brain and a Terrible Roar, can turn Invisible, and is Covered with a Thick Slime.

[Noble]

Noble is a Giant Ape that eats Trees, has a Single Giant Eye and a Terrible Roar, is Covered in Bumps and Nodules, and CANNOT BE STOPPED.

BWAHAHAHA I CANNOT BE STOPPED!!!!

and to prove it I stomped Masked Revenger into the ground :D
Noble vs. Masked Revenger (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Noble&def=Masked+Revenger&a=S)
And wins again Noble vs. Empyreal (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Noble&def=Empyreal&a=S)
and again Noble vs. Iggy (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Noble&def=iggy&a=S)
and again Noble vs. coldcut (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Noble&def=coldcut&a=S)
and again Noble vs. 8 Ball (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Noble&def=8+Ball&a=S)
and again Noble vs. Poison (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Noble&def=Poison&a=S)
and again Noble vs. Malibu Sally's Bossoms (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Noble&def=Malibu+Sally%27s+Bazooms&a=S)

ok thats enough. I'm winning by raw strength hahaha.

[Tsarmina]

Oh yeah? Teeehee hee (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Hollis&def=Noble&a=I)

[Sable Phoenix]

It calculates your stats based on the characters you enter for its name.

[sheld0n]

sheld0n is a Giant Mecha-Dragon that breathes Poisonous Gas, fires Rockets, controls Human Thought, and is Covered in Bumps and Nodules.

http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=sheld0n&def=sable+phoenix&a=A

[Noble]

Oh yeah? Teeehee hee (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Hollis&def=Noble&a=I)

Noble strikes back! (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Noble&def=Hollis&a=S)
Twice!! (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Noble&def=Hollis&a=A)

My giant ape's' strength and agility surpass those of a squid MWAHAHA! :P

and I just fought Sheldon's thing and beat his dragon in strength and agility, and we tied in intelligence.

My Apes stats are:
13 strength
9 agility
7 intelligence

I think the only way to truely test a monster's superiority is to do the fight three times, once for each attribute. Whichever wins 2 of the 3 times is the better monster. The overall thing.

[sheld0n]

Also, not that the stats change depending on weather youre attacking or defending.

For example, when im attacking my stats are as follows:
Strength: 10
Agility: 9
Intelligence: 10

But when im defending, my stats change to:
Strength: 9
Agility: 9
Intelligence: 8


Go figure...

[the_starcrosser]

Dusty is a Giant Squid that eats Trees, dissolves in Water, has X-Ray Vision and a Long, Prehensile Tongue, and fears the Military. (btw Suede won by one point)
Woohoo!

Ooo, it's a huge tie (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/robot.cgi?att=Suede&def=Dusty&a=F) for Suede-bot and Dusty-bot, though... :D

[Chain Lightning]

This thing is ghetto. It gave me a buttlerfly, whoopee, and I noticed all you have to do is attack using the attribute that's lower then the one of the monster you're fighting.

Is there anyway to change what monster you get? Looks to me like it's really limited.

[Kinetix]

Kinetix is a Giant Bee that spits Ice, Glows in the Dark, breathes Ice Vapour, will turn back into a Human in the morning, has a Computer for a Brain, and is Radioactive

Strength: 4
Agility: 6
Intelligence: 11

[Noble]

So far I'm the only one who has actually received a monster where in his description it says that he CANNOT BE STOPPED! I guess I'm just special :P .

[Sebastian Kain]

So far I'm the only one who has actually received a monster where in his description it says that he CANNOT BE STOPPED! I guess I'm just special :P .

I tried to fight you earlier with intelligence..and it came out as a tie. Wasn't really sure how the thing worked... :|

[Amoeba Man]

Akamaz is a Banana-Eating Attack Monkey with a Battle Rating of 7.6Unleash your own Food-Eating Battle Monkey agains Akamaz (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monkey?def=Akamaz)

Bahahaha! (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monkey.cgi?att=amoeba-man&def=Akamaz)

So far I'm the only one who has actually received a monster where in his description it says that he CANNOT BE STOPPED! I guess I'm just special :P .

More Bahahaha!! (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Amoeba-Man&def=Noble&a=I)

And so what if I cower from Radiation. I'm Worshipped as a God, and carry a Samurai Sword. That's gotta count for something. :D

[Gaia]

Woohoo!

Ooo, it's a huge tie (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/robot.cgi?att=Suede&def=Dusty&a=F) for Suede-bot and Dusty-bot, though... :D

ROFL! I love the Dusty-bot description. It suits him quite nicely :D :chuckle:

[Noble]

More Bahahaha!! (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Amoeba-Man&def=Noble&a=I)



KaPow!Noble strikes back! (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Noble&def=Amoeba-Man&a=S)
Shazaam!! OH! He strikes back TWICE! (http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster.cgi?att=Noble&def=Amoeba-Man&a=A)

*Does the funky chicken dance* :P