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View Full Version : **** OFF, Jimmy Olsen


Joe Schmoe
08-14-2008, 02:34 PM
So, I'm exhausted. Due to cirumstances lately, it takes me forever to fall asleep, and then forever to wake up. I'm pretty much nocturnal.

But I just found myself refusing to go back to sleep because EVERY dream I was having had my least favorite comic book character ever popping in everytime he got a chance: Jimmy Olsen. He was like the loser at a party stalking you, and making the obvious jokes every chance he could get, just for a shot at some sort of positive attention. He would NOT go away!

At one point, he was wearing a live snake. And he was like "Haha, its a snake. Isn't that hilarious?" NO JIMMY! Its not! You're an idiot! I hate you. Who created you?! You're useless! Everything you ever say is stupid. You always look like a moron. You never know what's going on ever. Your best friend is the most powerful human being on the planet, and you don't even notice it because he's wearing glasses, you dip****.

At another point, he was wearing the same outfit as Lois Lane because again, he thinks he's that god damn hysterical, and I jerked my head awake just to get away from him, which ended with my smacking my head against the desk. God damn it Jimmy.

I can't be more pissed at this loser. Every god damn dream.. The only way I could avoid him was to not go back to sleep. I'm so tired, but I have to get away from this guy. sjsjdngjn Why hasn't anyone killed this guy yet?! Someday, I want to get into the industry, JUST to write a story arc where Olsen is brutally raped to death.

Oh, and you know who else wears women's clothing, Jimmy? Gay male hookers. Get into that career choice, because you should NEVER be involved in reporting ever.

http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y143/JoeSchmoe4ever/JIMMY.jpg

bpphantom
08-14-2008, 02:40 PM
ROFLZ! Oh god that helped pick me up today :)

Thanks crazy Joe guy.

Yin
08-14-2008, 02:54 PM
ROTFHELICOPTERLAUNCHPAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!

HILARIOUS!

thebluecanary
08-14-2008, 03:02 PM
Wait... I always thought Joe WAS Jimmy... OH I get it now...

Bitter Babe
08-14-2008, 03:27 PM
Hahahaha I'm sorry Joe but I just can't help but laughing.

Solario
08-14-2008, 04:12 PM
Duel at dawn, sir.

Jimmy Olsen is one of DC's finest characters.

iggy880
08-14-2008, 05:04 PM
That was helpful this morning. See many of my dreams are about another comic red-head...Mary Jane, and no that's not weird :notme:

Seadevil
08-14-2008, 06:38 PM
Duel at dawn, sir.

Jimmy Olsen is one of DC's finest characters.

The fact that you can say that after Countdown, with a straight face, negates your opinion. :p

Solario
08-14-2008, 07:13 PM
**** Countdown. And btw, Iron Man? Still ****ing awesome despite Civil War.


Seriously go read Kirby's Jimmy Olsen stuff or Morrison's All-Star Superman for more indepth appreciation of The Bowtie.

Nerfed
08-14-2008, 07:28 PM
So, I'm exhausted. Due to cirumstances lately, it takes me forever to fall asleep, and then forever to wake up. I'm pretty much nocturnal.

But I just found myself refusing to go back to sleep because EVERY dream I was having had my least favorite comic book character ever popping in everytime he got a chance: Jimmy Olsen. He was like the loser at a party stalking you, and making the obvious jokes every chance he could get, just for a shot at some sort of positive attention. He would NOT go away!

At one point, he was wearing a live snake. And he was like "Haha, its a snake. Isn't that hilarious?" NO JIMMY! Its not! You're an idiot! I hate you. Who created you?! You're useless! Everything you ever say is stupid. You always look like a moron. You never know what's going on ever. Your best friend is the most powerful human being on the planet, and you don't even notice it because he's wearing glasses, you dip****.

I'm not going to debate Jimmy Olsen's validity as a character with you as I feel that would waste both my time and your's with an opinion neither of us would care for.

However, the fact that Jimmy Olsen is in your dreams and saying crazy stupid stuff you hate is a product of your own mind and has very little to do with who created him and why. Rather than hate Jimmy Olsen, perhaps you should ask yourself why all the self-hatred? As part of your dream, he is only what you make him... thus, part of you must want to punish yourself with something you hate amplified by even more hateful stuff about him that you projected on to him.


Stop hating yourself, Joe. Its the first step toward self-love.

bpphantom
08-14-2008, 07:33 PM
Stop hating yourself, Joe. Its the first step toward self-love.

The second step involves a box of kleenex, a tube of EZ Squeeze and teh intarnets.

:D

Knightward
08-14-2008, 07:47 PM
Jimmy Olsen you say?

The image links don't work because of the friggin profanity filter, but it's easy enough to figure out what the address is.

http://www.super****ery.com/images/stories/oneshot/vonolsen.jpg


http://www.super****ery.com/images/stories/oneshot/jolsen_159_04.jpg

Nerfed
08-14-2008, 08:18 PM
TinyURL.com is a convenient workaround for the profanity filter.