So today always begs the question...

[RedSwitchblade]

...What is love?

Besides this:
http://juane.podomatic.com/2007-01-14T07_34_12-08_00.jpg

Philosophical discussion ahoy!

[Dynamo-Man]

For me, this is love...

http://i143.photobucket.com/albums/r121/TDoolan005/EngagementBW.jpg

What does it mean? Like Rocky says, filling gaps. You know it's love when you compliment the other person perfectly. When you feel like someone is ripping your heart out whenever you see a tear that you caused. When you are willing to accept any flaw they might have, because in the end you know that they don't matter. When you now without a doubt taht you trust the other person more than you trust yourself. And when you are willing to do anything for them, without any regrets or complaints.

[sheld0n]

...What is love?


You don't know what an erection feels like?

[Gold Rush]

...What is love?

Besides this:
http://juane.podomatic.com/2007-01-14T07_34_12-08_00.jpg

Philosophical discussion ahoy!

"Baby, don't hurt me. Don't hurt me, no more."


And, actually, that line pretty much sums up my current state through the last few years, but as time heals wounds, I have gotten better.

On a lighter note, must say D-Man is right on the money with his statement.


========================================>

Gold Rush

[bpphantom]

Chemical reaction. Pheremones. A desire to fill a gaping wound within at the deepest level of our beings. Etc.

[Kozzma]

Chemical reaction. Pheremones. A desire to fill a gaping wound within at the deepest level of our beings. Etc.
Verry Nice

[Dr Jack Wolfe]

Rare and valuable

[Nerfed]

Love is trusting someone with with everything you are and accepting that person for all that they are.

Love is enjoying each other's company without having to say a word.

Love is... not strangling your partner after enduring a dutch oven. ;)

[Dynamo-Man]

Love is... not strangling your partner after enduring a dutch oven. ;)
QFT!!! :lmao:

[Nerfed]

I'm such a romantic.

[bpphantom]

I saw a great webcomic definition about this once:

Love is giving someone the power to hurt you very badly, and trusting them not to.

That being said, I stand by my first answer.

[RedSwitchblade]

Well, aside from D-Man and maybe Nerfed, this thread was an amusing failure :)

You bitter old bastards :P

[Endless One]

Love is so many things, but love isn't a feeling. Love is an action. People forget that. And when the fluttery feeling is gone, they fail when they forget the second part.

My love is free. I'm glad he gets that.

[Seadevil]

...What is love?

Anal.

[Nerfed]

Well, aside from D-Man and maybe Nerfed, this thread was an amusing failure :)

You bitter old bastards :P


I'm... not sure I understand.

Did D-Man and I make our small part of the thread an unamusing success?

[bpphantom]

...What is love?

Baby don't hurt me...

[Poison]

Dammit, Phantom read my mind!

http://www.myphoned.com/uploads/mini/520/roxbury.gif

[bpphantom]

It's the only thing looping through my head since I read Red's first post. I've gotta listen to something to kill the music... maybe country music. It's kills hopes and dreams after all ;)

[Nerfed]

What is love?

http://img405.imageshack.us/img405/9905/trekkieswa5.gif


...for Trekkies.

[Yin]

In my generation love seems to be how well you can lay the pipe. I always tell every girl that looks like a potential that I'm not that big on sex (and it took me awhile to get like this :D ). Sex dictates so many aspects of a relationship, and if people would just take a minute and a half to look at the bigger picture they would see what sex actually does. It keeps both men and women in abusive, controlling, manipulative, physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally damaging relationships. It also can lead to affairs/cheating. One of my good friends has been with his (now fiance) for almost 4 years now. She's cheated on him more than once (and he still doesn't believe it), and just some of the things she says you can tell it's based off of sex. She's actually said, "Well, if he loves me so much, then why won't he have sex with me everytime I ask?", and during her cheatin' phase she said, "Well, sometimes you just need somethin' new."

There is a purity that is shared between two people when sex is either limited or complete absent (which is hard). You know that you're with that person because of who they are, not how good they put it on you. I find it more sexy when a girl holds out instead of putting it right on front street. If she's willing to put it out after the first couple days, or even that same night for you, then chances are she's doin' the same for everyone else.

So what is love to me? A purity. An untainted spiritual/emotional essence that is based off of something true. Once you have that established, then you can bump uglies in the bed all you want. :D And it's a shame because I just don't see that anymore. At all. I've come across several different friends who stay in their relationships because the sex is just that good. They'll put up with anything and everything and still stay.

[Knightward]

It's seeing someone else's crap and not being bothered by it.

[RedSwitchblade]

It's seeing someone else's crap and not being bothered by it.

That is astoundingly accurate, right up there with BPP's second answer :P

[RedSwitchblade]

I'm... not sure I understand.

Did D-Man and I make our small part of the thread an unamusing success?

No the whole thread is amusing, but "erection" and "anal" and "pheromones" made it a failure. Way to set the bar, guys! :shinner: :lol: :D :chuckle:

[Nerfed]

Thanks?

[sheld0n]

:P

You know none of us really think that.

I think that trying to define love is doing it a disservice, since you can only understand it once you experience it. Even if you write down an entire list of "symptoms" of love, you would still only describe a tiny aspect of it, since you'd be limited to words.

[The Mystic]

Love is a battlefield...

edit:

Love hurts. Love scars. Love wounds and mars any heart not tough or stong enough to take a lot of pain.


Ooh, ooh love hurts.

[Solario]

Chemical imbalance of the brain? I don't know, I'm not feeling terribly witty, so you guys have to settle for that quote.

[Stan Walker]

Love is finding someone just as f****d up as you and settling down with them. :)

[Alumette]

Love is all you need.

Okay, not entirely true. I have been deeply in love with people with whom I know it just "wouldn't work out" because of other things. Case in point:

Dated a guy for a while, we were madly into eachother on a very spiritual level. Honestly it was the real deal. So why am I not with this guy? Because we are of different religious faiths. Big deal, you say. People of differing faiths get married all the time. And it's true, they do. I in fact did marry a guy who is a different faith than I am. But...

this other guy's religion was so important to him that I was not willing to ask him to change. He was a very devout Catholic, with everything that entails, including the birth control thing. As many of you know I have no desire to be a parent. I was not about to ask this guy to go back on his strong beliefs just because they were inconvenient for me; nor was I about to bring a child (or more) into the world just because I was madly in love with this guy.

It was one of those, "in another place, in another time," things. We left it at that. But the love was certainly there, no doubt about it.

So yeah. Love isn't *all* you need, but if it's not there, well, everything else is just fake.

That said, to answer the question (despite that damned song being stuck in my head now... the Roxbury one, not the most excellent Beatles tune):

Love is when you know in your very bones that no matter how difficult things get, you will always be worse off alone than with your mate. This isn't to say that you're not an independent person. Rather, it means that you've decided that that person enhances your life in a way that no other person, thing, activity, or belief could.

I can't imagine my life without Mr. Lummy. Very often I can imagine my life without the few annoying habits that Mr. Lummy has ;) , but I can't imagine my life without him. And even those annoying habits are precious. As I often say to him when we're being completely weird, "You can't ever leave me, because no one else would ever 'get it.' "

But this is all answering the question (more or less) "What is a [romantic] relationship?"

Separate from romantic love, I believe that love is (for lack of a better analogy) like The Force. It's everywhere, animating the universe, and we owe it to ourselves and one another to channel it throughout our thoughts, actions, choices, and lives. As Mother Teresa said, "We can do no great things. Only small things with great love." (Thanks, Wids.) When your life is animated by love, everything changes. It doesn't mean that everything is happy and perfect all the time. But it does mean that you are more equipped to weather the storms and messes of life with self-acceptance, patience, and compassion; and it starts with yourself. I believe strongly that one cannot live a full, authentic life if one has not learned to genuinely love oneself. And not in a vain or self-centered way; but in the same way you would hope your mate would love you: with patience and acceptance of your faults, a willingness to help you learn from them and grow as a person, as well as a celebration of your best qualities and successes. When you are able to do that with yourself, you are better able to accept it from others and, most importantly, share it with others.

And bringing it full circle, to the question of romantic love, as I believe that was the original motivation for the thread, I think this quote from Robert Louis Stevenson describes it best. It specifically deals with romantic, matrimonial love; but I believe it can be applied to friendships, family relationships, and the like; all those relationships we have where love is the foundation and the essential--the thing that makes us all better people when we embrace it fully:

“A man expects an angel for a wife, yet knows that she is like himself—erring, thoughtless, and untrue; but like himself also, filled with a struggling radiancy of better things…You may safely go to school with hope, but ere you marry, you have learned the mingled lesson of the world: that hope and love address themselves to a perfection never realized, and yet firmly held, become the salt and staff of life; that you yourself are compacted of infirmities…and yet you have something in you lovable and worth preserving; and that, while the mass of mankind lies under this scurvy condemnation, you will scarce find one but, by some generous reading, will become to you a lesson, a model, and a noble spouse throughout life. So thinking, you will constantly support your own unworthiness and easily forgive the failings of your friend. Nay, you will be wisely glad that you retain the blemishes; for the faults of married people continually spur up each of them, hour by hour, to do better and to meet and love upon a higher ground.”
--ROBERT LOUIS STEVENSON
from Virginibus Peurisque

[Knightward]

That is astoundingly accurate, right up there with BPP's second answer :P
Great minds think alike? That and/or they give lengthy Lummy-answers?

[Poison]

Chemical imbalance of the brain? I don't know, I'm not feeling terribly witty, so you guys have to settle for that quote. Wasn't it "Happiness is a temporary chemical imbalance of the true state of mind."

[The Widowed]

Love means never having to say you're horny. :D


*kisses Gaia again, just to see if she makes that "mmrf" sound again* :lol:

[Snakebite]

Love is overated!


...that is all.

[Dynamo-Man]

Love is overated!


...that is all.
You're single, aren't you? :eyebrow:

[WingedAvenger]

Love means you're always willing to put up with someone else's ****.

[Graphite]

The word "Love" is a terrible word, mainly because it's to simplistic a term for such a complex action, emotion and perspective. Personally, I think the Greek's Definitions (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Greek_words_for_love) are highly more accurate. Seriously, we use the same word to describe I love my Wife, I love my God and I love my shoe.

:rolleyes:

So what is love to me? A purity. An untainted spiritual/emotional essence that is based off of something true. Once you have that established, then you can bump uglies in the bed all you want. :D And it's a shame because I just don't see that anymore. At all. I've come across several different friends who stay in their relationships because the sex is just that good. They'll put up with anything and everything and still stay.

/Agree with Yin. Love is first and for most metaphysical. It is in essense a bind force that unites the Universe. So from there, it means we are tapping into the realm of believes. I believe in a God who Loves me. Therefore, I believe in Love. This can then be extended to Human Couplets (not just m/f mind you or even just h/w). The degree then depends on the depth of the relationship. D-Man touched well on this. Funny thing Yin, is where me and my girlfriend we have an incredable spiritual depth (she truely makes me feel completely alive) yet where we bump heads most is in the Bed Room. Yet I don't think any amount of Sex will make me question her love for me or mine for hers.

Also clearly Phantom is an Existentialist (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Existentialist), and thus I cannot dispute your claims. All I would question is not the mechanics involved but why they exist in the first place. I've heard there are two root emotions, love and fear. Or perhaps better yet: love and a lack of love. So to sum up, IMHO if we didn't *need* love, then we wouldn't *need* life ether. Ultimately it is the basis of all human community formed from the rejection of isolation.

:p

Edit: Damn, I wish I could find the quote form Joan of Arcadia. It was something to the affect of she was asking God why do we love. Then God (as that highly insiteful kid) said because if you didn't you probably wouldn't risk it. Being close to others is painful because you become attached to them. Yet that is what it means to be human, Re ligarete. To bind and rebind, stronger than before. (Lummy probably knows the French better than I do heh).

[The Widowed]

Love bites. Love bleeds. It's bringing me to my knees....

And necrophilia is cracking open a cold one. :P

You're single, aren't you? :eyebrow:
Yep! :singdance

Also, I love Alumette. But then, who doesn't? :)

[Nerfed]

And necrophilia is cracking open a cold one. :P

That's a new one to me.

[razoras]

I know it's love when they come into my van for candy.

[Dynamo-Man]

I know it's love when they come into my van for candy.
I lol'd.

[The Widowed]

I lol'd.
So did I.

We're sick bastards, all right. Sick! Joe-Schmoe-level sick! :lol:

[ThunderMace]

I know it's love when they come into my van for candy.
Hey! I never got my candy! and my butt hurts!

Actually, love is finding someone who treats you like you feel you deserve to be treated. And vice versa.